{"id":28733,"date":"2017-10-24T12:16:17","date_gmt":"2017-10-24T16:16:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.wework.com\/creator\/creator\/?p=28733"},"modified":"2020-02-26T14:30:47","modified_gmt":"2020-02-26T19:30:47","slug":"esther-perel-built-relationship-advice-empire","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wework.com\/ideas\/professional-development\/esther-perel-built-relationship-advice-empire","title":{"rendered":"Ask a Creator: How Esther Perel built a relationship advice empire"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You know you\u2019ve made it when you can get nearly 150 people into a room at 8 a.m. to talk about relationships. Not that there was any question that Esther Perel, the internationally bestselling author and psychotherapist, could fill a room. Perel catapulted into the popular consciousness with her 2013 TED talk \u201c<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ted.com\/talks\/esther_perel_the_secret_to_desire_in_a_long_term_relationship\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The secret to desire in a long-term relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,\u201d and her groundbreaking podcast <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.estherperel.com\/podcast\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><em>Where Should We Begin?<\/em><\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, which pulls back the curtain on couples therapy sessions, has solidified her place as a trusted expert in relationship advice. She continues to top the iTunes podcast charts and <em>New York Times<\/em> bestseller list simultaneously.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In her talk October 17 at D.C.&#8217;s <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wework.com\/buildings\/white-house--washington-DC\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">WeWork White House<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (yes, the one at 8 a.m.), Perel addressed relationship questions from the audience and introduced her latest book, <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><em>The State of Affairs<\/em><\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, which tackles the taboo topic of infidelity.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So how did Perel build her brand to the powerhouse it is today? How does she communicate with her team? We found out her expertise doesn\u2019t end with relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure><iframe loading=\"lazy\" style=\"border: none; overflow: hidden;\" src=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/plugins\/video.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2FWeWork%2Fvideos%2F1924965214182195%2F&amp;show_text=0&amp;width=560\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><b><strong>What have been some of the challenges in going from being a therapist to a relationship advice brand?<\/strong><\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The first challenge was the word \u201cbrand\u201d itself. Becoming a brand was totally foreign to me, because I\u2019d been a therapist for 34 years. I didn\u2019t know how to do it without selling out. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-pullquote\"><blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Becoming a brand was totally foreign to me. I didn\u2019t know how to do it without selling out.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Then, the question was, \u201cHow do I scale?\u201d I always thought of therapy as happening in person with one individual or with a couple, not in the big scope. How do you go wide without compromising depth and complexity?<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The third thing was that I had worked alone for 30 years. I never had a team. Therapist is a very lonely job, actually. You enter the lives of others, but the essence of the job is quite alone. Now I have a team of seven.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b><strong>So how have you expanded your scope without feeling like you were selling out?<\/strong><\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I continuously marry depth, creativity, and integrity. The best example of that has been the podcast. It\u2019s doing something that was never done: taking therapy into the public square. The sessions are with couples who apply for the podcast and then we show the therapy work I actually do, and by that, we reach millions. Who would think, that with all the stigma therapy has, that people would respond in this way? It\u2019s creativity, integrity, and scaling.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"\/ideas\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/4\/2017\/10\/Esther-Perel-WeWork-DC-state-of-affairs-book-signing-800x571.jpg\" alt=\"Esther Perel signs copies of The State of Affairs at WeWork White House\" class=\"wp-image-28735\"\/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><b>If someone reading this is thinking of starting their own company or brand, what advice would you give them?<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">My advice is that there is no way to avoid taking risks. It\u2019s a leap of faith, an act of engagement with the unknown. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Surround yourself with all kinds of people. Don\u2019t think you need to know what you don\u2019t know. I called everybody. Shamelessly. I asked help from anyone who could help me with this and with that. People are happy to help, especially when they believe in what they do. Be generous and people will be generous with you.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-pullquote\"><blockquote><p>Surround yourself with all kinds of people. I called everybody. Shamelessly.<\/p><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Part of your business right now is consulting with companies. What do you do with them?<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I\u2019m a psychological consultant with a bunch of tech startups. It\u2019s a population that doesn\u2019t always know enough about relationships. Sixty-five percent of startups fail because of cofounder relationship conflicts, according to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/books.google.com\/books?id=lZjqTQzJW5wC&amp;printsec=frontcover&amp;dq=The+Founder%27s+Dilemma&amp;hl=en&amp;sa=X&amp;ved=0ahUKEwjC4sbUzIfXAhWoxYMKHczYClwQ6AEIJjAA\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Harvard data<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>How can cofounders avoid this?<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The first thing is to make sure you give time to focus on your relationship. It\u2019s a marriage. You\u2019ll spend more time together than the partners you live with. It\u2019s so tempting to plunge into the work. [Take time to ask] how are we doing, how do you think we are as a team, how do we complement each other? I\u2019m with a business partner who is great at thinking about how to make the team feel valued. I have been self-employed, so my communications style isn\u2019t always up to par. What is often one person\u2019s strength is another person\u2019s vulnerability.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We\u2019ve [launched a book, a podcast, and workshops] in less than three years, and it\u2019s because I teamed up with the perfect business partner, Lindsay Ratowsky. I\u2019m very happy to tell people that I couldn\u2019t have done anything without her. She cofounded the brand.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"\/ideas\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/4\/2017\/10\/esther-perel-book-talk-dc-800x571.jpg\" alt=\"Esther Perel at WeWork White House\" class=\"wp-image-34955\"\/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><b>How can people balance work and personal relationships?<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Personal life directly affects what goes on when you leave the house. My general idea is people all live in networks of relationships, and the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives. And yet we don\u2019t attend to it. People go to the gym to take care of the body. I think it\u2019s offensive that people don\u2019t take care of the relationships in their lives the same way.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You know you\u2019ve made it when you can get nearly 150 people into a room at 8 a.m. to talk about relationships. Not that there was any question that Esther Perel, the internationally bestselling author and psychotherapist, could fill a room. Perel catapulted into the popular consciousness with her 2013 TED talk \u201cThe secret to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":902,"featured_media":28740,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[43902],"tags":[525,39218,39221],"class_list":["post-28733","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-professional-development","tag-personal-growth","tag-small-businesses","tag-entrepreneurs"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.8 (Yoast SEO v27.8) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Ask a Creator: How Esther Perel built a relationship advice empire<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"After speaking at WeWork White House, Esther Perel gave an exclusive interview to 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